Latest update 2013

Hello Non-readers,

     In today's excitement, my drama with my bestie increases. Did I mention that he wrote me a scathing email that really hurt me? He stated that my decision to not have children was because I was jealous. Was it projection? Was it because he was secretly in love with me? Who knows? All I know is that I have to get over my hurt feelings. I have a hard time, I keep thinking about the past and how I laid my heart out to him, only for him to stomp on it, then later tell me that, "if only"... That really chops me. 
     As for my awesome boyfriend, his parents will not accept me because I am not Christian. Oh well, so in the end he will probably dump me, or dump his parents. Which I find highly unlikely. When I hear how upset his parents would be, it breaks my heart. But, I will not be a Christian. I disagree with any religion. At least I did the right thing and kept him away from my family, that way, when it is over, they really never knew him. Sad, but true.  
     I never knew this was the path that was set out for me. I didn't get the marriage and family, but I got a fucked up couple of relationships that make me learn in a variety of ways. I love my boyfriend, and I love my bestie although they are messed up!!!
     This is Silverplatters signing out!!!!

Hurt feelings... Loose ends

Dealing with the feelings that come up when an ex gets engaged, moves away, or vacations with his new girlfriend make me feel jealous... I am super happy with my geek charming and my married bestie; so why am I feeling this way? Is it my Aphrodite complex? I seriously have a complex that makes me think I that every man should be in love with me... And when they're not, I get jealous. It's crazy, I know, but if I don't emote these feelings, or express them, they end up consuming me. At least I now know what it is. I seriously do not want to be with any of the men. I just want them to want me. Cookie and crazy but it's me!!!

The crazy game

Well hello non readers,
     In today's update there is much to be explained. First, a group I used to associate myself with blackballed me. I felt horrible. And want to know why I was eliminated. Mostly because I didn't donate to their for profit organization. Ugh.
     So,  the group completely excluded me from a meetup. My feelings are super hurt, then I find out that at the meetup, I was mentioned. Furthering my upset. I don't know how to process these feelings of rejection. Once again, I'm the social outcast.
     Only, the others members dig me because I am semi demi normal. For once, being the cool girl gets me ousted. I just can't win!
This is silverplatters signing out... Oh but all the other stuff is fabulous! Still have radio boyfriend and married bestie! Ciao!